July 15, 2022
So, you have a sabotaging coworker on your hands. How do you deal with them? The key is to take a deep breath and remember that the situation is not personal. It’s just about their own insecurities, frustrations, or professional jealousies. In this article we’re going to give some tips for dealing with toxic coworkers who are trying to make your life harder and increasing your stress levels.
Sabotaging coworkers

You can’t stop your coworker from sabotaging you, but you can control how you react. If a coworker is sabotaging you, the best thing to do is work smart and avoid reacting to their actions. Here are some tips for dealing with the stress of having a sabotaging coworker:
- Don’t let their sabotaging get inside your head. It might be tempting to get angry or frustrated by their behavior, but this will only increase the stress level in your head and body.
- Don’t engage with them on social media if they post something negative about you or your project.
- Don’t engage with them at their level the less petty interaction between the two of you, the better!
How can you identify the sabotaging coworker? Read on for some tips.
The silent assassin
The silent assassin is the coworker who doesn’t want to be noticed or heard. They will often attack you indirectly by spreading rumors, intentionally undermining you and creating in-fighting among the team.
These types of people are not a team player but rather take on the role as lone wolfs. These are dangerous individuals because they don’t have your back when things get rough, and instead try to cause more stress by causing problems for everyone else! They don’t play nice and they love bringing the drama!
When someone is being passive-aggressive toward you, it’s important be aware. You’ll want to address it appropriately so that other people don’t think you’re the rude or unreasonable one.
When they actively try to bring you down
This kind of coworker is actively trying to make your life harder. They’re either trying to get you fired, undermine your reputation with leadership and clients, or sabotage personal relationships with coworkers and clients. If a coworker is doing this to you, it’s important that you take action right away because they will likely escalate their behavior if left unchecked.
Consider the following options:
- Talk one-on-one with the person who has been acting out (if possible). This could help resolve any issues that have arisen which may not be addressed in a group setting. The goal here is to create an environment where both parties can air their grievances without fear of retribution from other coworkers.
- If talking doesn’t work, consult HR or another trusted supervisor for guidance on how best handle situations like these that fall outside of normal office protocol (not every workplace has procedures for when someone has been bullying their colleagues).
They do things just to make you angry
Some people sabotage their coworkers by doing things just to make them angry. They might steal your ideas, take credit for the work you do, or undermine your efforts in order to look good in comparison. This is a form of passive-aggressive behavior, and it can be difficult to deal with because it’s so indirect and subtle.
The best way to approach this type of person is by acknowledging that they are being manipulative and then trying not to let their actions get under your skin. Instead focus on what you have control over: yourself! Try not letting them get inside your head; otherwise they win!
They’re making your life more difficult on purpose
Most of the time, people are just trying to do their best and get along with others. That’s why it can be so frustrating when a coworker just doesn’t care about anyone else.
But there are some people who love making your life more difficult on purpose. They want you to fail because they’re jealous or bitter about something that happened in the past or because they simply don’t care about anyone except themselves.
It may seem like you should just ignore these toxic personalities, but if they’re causing problems for other team members, then talking your supervisor or HR might just the thing getting back on track.
You may also want to read: Workplace Bullying and 6 Impacts on Black Women
You may also want to read: Building a Resilient Career Mindset – Techniques and Mindsets for Black Women
They take credit for your work
When a coworker takes credit for your work, it can be hard to deal with. You might feel like you’re being manipulated or not getting the credit you deserve. It’s important to document your work so that you have evidence of what is yours, and who is taking advantage of you. If there are supportive coworkers or your supervisor who are willing to support you in this situation, reach out to them. Sometimes just having someone else acknowledge what’s happening can help make things feel better. Especially if its your boss who’s taking credit for your work.
Dealing with a sabotaging coworker can be stressful but working on your own self-esteem can help you feel better about the situation
- Work on your self-esteem.
- Focus on the positives.
- Be confident in your abilities.
- Don’t let them get to you.
- Don’t let them see you sweat.
- Document, document, and document! Address the situation with your supervisor or HR (using your documentation).
- Be willing to vote for your own mental health by finding another position if the situation is not resolved.
In conclusion, dealing with a sabotaging coworker can be stressful and frustrating, but there are ways to manage the situation. Working on your own self-esteem and learning how to communicate with them in a positive way will help you clearer better about the situation. So that you can take the appropriate actions needed to resolve your stress and improve your mental health.
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Twanna Carter, Ph.D., Career Transition Coach. I help high achieving professional women who are anxious about transitioning into a new career, have absolute confidence and belief in their own abilities, so they can communicate their unique value, honor their true purpose, and boldly pursue their dream career.
Are you done with stress? Are you ready for freedom?
If you’re ready to learn how to manage your stress, overcome obstacles, and live a life that’s truly your own, ask me about my Mental Health Fitness coaching program.
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Recommended Books
- Melaninated Magic: 180 Affirmations to Nurture Your Soul and Unleash Your Black Girl Joy by Twanna Carter, PhD
- “I’m Not Yelling: A Black Woman’s Guide to Navigating the Workplace (Successful Black Business Women)“, Elizabeth Leiba.
- “Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High” by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler.
- “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion” by Robert B. Cialdini.
- “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie.
- “Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead” by Sheryl Sandberg.
- “Dare to Lead” by Brene Brown.
- “The Memo“, by Minda Harts.
- “Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones“, by James Clear
- “Worthy: How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life“, by Jamie Kern Lima
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